There’s someone inside my mind. Before, they were in the corner of my room, but then they crawled inside me.
Feeling my face, I can’t feel anything. My throat is raw from the clawing from inside.
There’s whispers in here in here
They don’t recognize or acknowledge me because I’m not what they think of.
They open the door for talk about the pain deep inside.
But they only think of the sad pain.
I have the sad pain.
But it’s drowned out by the other pain.
The pain they won’t acknowledge.
I’m hearing things. I’m seeing things
This is not real
I can’t stop this
No one can stop this
The medication is working but I’m still hurting
It did matter to me.
I wanted to be better
My mental health mattered to me
I want to be ok
I do
But they just want to label me and leave me and lock me away
And watch me fade away.
“do you see anyone in the room right now?”
Maybe I do
Maybe I don’t
What are you gonna do about it?
About the person deep inside
Choking me from the inside
You’ll write me off and put me in chains
You don’t want to help me
None of you want me to be better
To be happy
I’m the only one on my team
My heart beats in sync with theirs
They breathe for me
We all know what will become of me
I’m the only one on my team
If I don’t care about me
Then who will?
I have no choice
I am the only one who can save me
I’ll perform a dissection and remove this person from inside me
I am happy
I am happy
I am happy
I am free.