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violet in me

By: Valentina A.

violet in me is a poem exploring the passivity many women in Colombian culture (my native country) are expected to have, and as a result, keep their anger hidden. Widely influenced by my family and cultural expectations, I wanted to write about my experience as a young girl comin to start therapy and discover ways in which to unleash anger.

3rd · High School Writing (2020)

mother used to say
girls cannot be angry
but boys? oh let them run free
free is the price of nothing
and what i hope to be
i want to
dance under the rain
thunderous
and step in puddles
let dirt splatter paint my skin
i want
toy cars for christmas
not dolls that need caring
mother was handed the responsibility
of caring for me
i want
nothing less
than to be free
but anger is a mouse trap
i keep getting my mind stuck on

therapist says i have
a harsh conscience
mixed with passivity
blue and red don’t always make purple
adding too much of either one
ruins the balance
i am imbalanced
blue- violet
violet- red
depending on the day
i am angry
but could never think of telling
mother face to face
because girls don’t get angry
just like a blank slate