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An Eternity Without Guilts

By: Shanti K.

2nd · High School Writing (2018)

When I ask why you don’t take off your jacket.
You assure me that I wouldn’t want to see your cuts.

Never could it be true
That I wouldn’t want to see a part of you,

Your every inch, centimeter, millimeter.
If I could see even the empty space that makes you up, I would.

I watch every image flicker across your eyes-the table snap under its own weight, the curtains fail to block out the glaring light. the curious onlooker whisk by. my tired eyes;
Every slight gesture-your eyebrows twitch, your biting of your lips, your finger scraping your lips, your sudden smile, your sudden expressionlessness.

When you assure me that I wouldn’t want to see your arms,
I want to hold you in mine; skeletons with skin are poor comfort.

An eternity of guilts will always haunt you;
Skeletons crumble under gravity,

And my ghost disappears behind guill
Still I linger, hoping for a moment when you may actually smile.

Do you feel the dust press against your lips?
Your warmth is something it can’t give back.

After every moment of exaltation,
I know anew I love you, strange as it may be;

I want to hold you eternally but forget you pass through my arms,
Crushed by an eternity of guilts.

I watch every image flicker across your eyes-the chair hold us, my arms wrap around you, your jacket drop to your side, you in my eyes, my earthy smile.
Do you notice these things?

After every moment of exaftation,
I love your cuts, I love your arms, I love you.

Please, don’t feel the need to hide from me.